Ghosts? Goblins? Skeletons? Witches? Eggs & Shaving Cream Vandals?
All have ceased to frighten this 'tough guy' anymore, as I have moved onto bigger & better fears, obviously listed here:
1) Christmas Shopping
2) Civilians that wear Berets
3) Nightmares in which I become a "non-smoker"
4) Any Reality TV Show
5) The News
6) People Who Park In Fire Lanes (and the Cops that Refuse to Ticket Them)
7) The fact that they're still running commercials with Billy Mays in them, 4 months after his untimely death (hey, we've still got Anthony (Sully) Sullivan, Ron Popeil & that Shammy Whammy guy with the headset—what gives?)
8) Global Freezing
9) Non-smoking, beret-wearing Christmas shoppers parked in fire lanes (to which patrolling police are oblivious) to purchase products currently advertised by the Late Billy Mays for a new Reality TV Show that just made the News
10) Having to write a "Thanksgiving" Blog Entry within the next 3 weeks
11) Continually noticing 11:11 on my digital clock
12) Waiting for falling "moon debris" after we blasted it seeking water on Friday, Oct. 9th
13) The Number 13 (still can't shake this stupid-stition)
14) Noticing spelling errors on blogs I wrote months ago
15) Coming in contact with Anyone who is not aware of the existence of my 3 books, Miscellaneous Hullabaloo, Inane Balderdash, & "...and now, more fun with...", for, after reading these clever & entertaining blog-entries (conceit?), I know people will be dying (Halloween Pun?)
to get such bound-printed matter into their personal reading collections...
Well, off to get my costume—this year, in recompense for free candy, I'll be trick-or-treating as a busted car with an extended warranty I heard about on TV, you know, the ones that "pay the repair shop" directly?
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